Toilet Training: Missing the Moment

Toilet Training, Self Toilet training, Toddlers and Toilet Training

Some time ago, Kahlei started toilet training herself. After the stresses we went through trying to get Ellie trained, I was thrilled. She would happily take herself off to the toilet or ask me for some help.

In fact, by the time Ellie had it together I thought we might actually have both girls using the toilet before Jasper’s birth. Obviously, that didn’t happen, but I decided this time around to be a whole lot let stressed and to be led by Kahlei.

When we moved in with mum, she shied away from toileting and I was alright with that as I assumed we would soon be settling into our own house and then she would start again.

9 months later and we were finally moving and, while Kahlei is happy to take her nappy off after each wee and will come to me straight after doing a poo we are still in a weird limbo. Some days undies and toilet trips are the norm. Other times she demands I put her in a nappy.

She is easily swayed to try the toileting thing, like when we were asked to try some Kleenex Flushable Wipes but she is equally as easily distracted and happy to forget about it. For now, we’re doing okay and I am hopeful we will continue to do so. I am still wanting to take the relaxed approach, but I wonder if I am being too relaxed.

At what point is it appropriate to strongly encourage her to go full time and simply stop allowing her to decide by not putting her in a nappy? And what happens if I’ve missed the critical moment? I’d love to hear your toilet training tips and stories!



  1. Hi Becky, when I did my road trip I met up with Daisy from Daisy Roo and Two. She’s been there/ with toilet training & has a great program which worked. Pop on over & tell her I sent you! denyse

    • Hi Denyse, thanks for the tip! I did see Daisy had a TT post recently but I’ve not had the time to do much blog reading so I’ll make sure I go over and see how she does things!

  2. We’ve had a wide range of timing and readiness amongst our children from one who decided to use the toilet all by herself and was even dry overnight by the ago of two. Some of the others wee almost three before day trained and much older for night time. One thing which helped with those who were less motivated was a little old fashioned bribery for just a few weeks. Every success was rewarded, with a small food treat or you could choose a time session on a new special toy or some other treat.

    • Yes, I am thinking bribery will be what works for us. Hoping to find something that she will just HAVE to have, you know?


  1. Kleenex Cottonelle Flushable Moist Wipes | Becky and James - [...] at 4, has been wiping herself for quite awhile now and hasn’t had any issues. Kahlei, 3, is still…

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