Him, Me and the Sea

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Last Thursday, Felix fell asleep in the car on the way home from town, as babies tend to do and because we had nowhere to be and didn’t have a 4-and-a-half year old to get bored with us, so I decided I’d park somewhere and let him sleep.

Waking a sleeping baby is something I hate to do, yet I do at least once most days because, life. So, this day I took the opportunity to let my little man sleep. It was a beautiful day. Warm and sunny, with the waves lapping at the rocks, birds soaring through the sky.

mossy point, south coast NSW, Eurobodalla,
Felix slept and slept and slept. I didn’t have a book and spent the time creating a Steller story aptly named ‘Out my window while baby sleeps’. Listening to Felix’s little-man-snores, I thought about how lonely I have been feeling. Somehow, this time around I have found life with a baby to be more isolating than I did when I was stuck home suffering from postnatal depression, knowing nobody and going nowhere.

I’m finding it frustrating and ridiculous that I feel surrounded by people yet still feel like I’m talking to myself most of the time.

During my woe-is-me session, I looked out the window to see whales frolicking out towards the horizon. One, in particular, caught my eye as it leapt from the water.

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And just as it caught my attention Felix woke up. With an hour until school pick up, we got out and watched the whale for a moment and as we sat he disappeared but we stayed, soaking up the sun and playing in the grass.

It was a perfect afternoon, leaving me feeling warm, happy and recharged.

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It was the perfect reminder that this parenting gig (and life in general) is a mixture of the good and the bad. Moments of sadness can be changed by moments of happiness. Moments of happiness can be tinged with sadness. As our children grow we celebrate their milestones while mourning that they are not our little babies anymore.

Him, me and the sea, Eurobodalla

He wants to grow up so fast and I can’t believe that this big boy was my tiny little baby just four short months ago.

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Sometimes, you need a little sea air and sun to remember the loneliness won’t last forever and babies don’t stay little for long. I’ll take those lonely hours while he sleeps so that we can then share our special moments before we need to be rushing about again.

I’m looking forward to this Thursday, when we can do it all again. When it can be just him, me and the sea.

atthesea9When did you last sit and just enjoy the view and company?

Linking up with Essentially Jess for #ibot

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6 Comments

  1. It’s nice sometimes to stop rushing, be idle and access where we’re at as individuals. To be honest, and define what we need. Obviously that time you gave to yourself was enough to start feeling contentment. Hope you can combat that loneliness xx

  2. I can totally relate to this, sometimes a bit of fresh air, sun and change of scenery can work wonders!

  3. Those cheeks – they are just begging to be kissed! I used to hate having to wake up my baby to go and pick up her brother from kindy or what have you. Sounds like that does of sun, sea and solitude was just what you needed.

    Visiting from #teamIBOT x

  4. Awww he is just the cutest little darling around. I totally get what you say about being lonely at times. Although that peace and quiet is lovely too. Enjoy your date with your little one next Thursday x

  5. I’m sorry you’ve been feeling lonely Becky. It’s funny how parenting can do that, even when you’re experienced at it.
    I love that you took that moment though. I hope you get to have many more like it.

  6. Sorry to hear you’ve been feeling lonely…a friend of mine had a similar experience the second time around as well. But yeah, it helps to remember that life is a mixture of good and bad moments, happy and sad moments…and the need to just live in the moment. Thanks for the timely reminder too.

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