{52 Weeks} Week 45: Approaching 28

Posted by becky on May 20, 2011 in Uncategorized | 4 comments

Before I go on with this post, I should put up the few photos I’ve missed posting. I’ve taken them each week, though. I know, slack.

Week 42: Walk on the Mount

Week 43: Bloggers Brunch!

Week 44: Try Not to Smile, please.

Week 45: Approaching 28

Yes – the photo for this week is totally (and obviously) photoshopped, right down to those entirely too long eyelashes (if only they were actually that long). Why? Well, as I was picking my photo for this week I was thinking about my impending birthday and James’ question of “What do you want?” as well as my whole It’s All About ME thing.

I was thinking about what my face would look like if I’d had facials, or how much longer my eyelashes would seem with a tint and wondering if coloured contacts could ever suit me. Not that I necessarily want to do these things, but it was fun imagining while I played with my photo.

As I was musing the conclusion I came to was simply this; my birthday should be all about pampering, indulgence and spoiling – in short, all about me.

Let’s do some dreaming, shall we?

For my 28th birthday I would like….

… To have an indulgent weekend away; staying somewhere deliciously fancy, sleeping late, doing breakfast, strolling past sights and sipping on cocktails*

… A family weekend away; staying somewhere family friendly, going to the zoo and/or aquarium, visiting parks and having fun

… A stay at a cosy B&B; where I can curl up by the fire, drink perfect hot chocolate and read a book undisturbed all while roasting marshmallows

Notice a theme here?

What would you ask for?

* In the interest of honesty – I’ve never had a cocktail, so I am unsure if you sip them as such?

You + PND: So, Now What?

Posted by becky on Apr 29, 2011 in Post Natal Depression, You + PND | 5 comments

Once you’ve realised/acknowledged there could be a problem, that you are displaying signs and/or symptoms of Postnatal Depression, it can be difficult to know where to go from there, especially if you have to wait for a doctor’s appointment. I highly recommend that you push for an appointment that day if at all possible, even if just to keep you from driving yourself mad thinking about it.

Here are some things which worked for me and a couple of things I wish I had done as soon as I was diagnosed;

* See your doctor – I wasn’t going to list this, but then I decided to do so anyway to cover all the bases. See a doctor you trust and talk about the options available to you.

* Connect - Your doctor will probably refer you to any available services in your area, but if he doesn’t bring it up yourself. I have discovered there are many services equipped to help mums with PND such as Family Support, Volunteer Home Visiting Services, a Mental Health team and many other community run programs. Once you have been referred or have the details make sure you contact them. As I was told at one point: “These service are here for a reason and if you don’t use them I will be out of a job.”

* Say yes – I connected with all the services in my area and then when it came to having them visit and help me I freaked out. I wanted to use any excuse to say no, and so it took a lot of courage and will power to say yes, please come into my house and help me. And, every week I struggled with it but I did so because I knew it was one thing that was keeping me going in the worst time.

* Ask for help – I know I am not the only person who struggles with this. I’m sure I am not alone in wishing others would see what needs to be done and do it; whether it be cleaning the house, shopping, taking the kids when things are particularly hard or just sitting to have a chat. But, mostly, things like that don’t happen. Mostly, you need to swallow your pride and ask. Even now, I find this so hard and will often leave things to avoid having to. Yes, it’s bad and I am working on it.

* Be specific – Depending on who you’re asking, you may need to be more specific than “I need help”. The problem I find here is that sometimes I have no idea exactly what I want them to do for me, sometimes I just want them to interpret what I need and get on with it. But, if you do know what you want speak out. Doing so will avoid frustration for all involved.

* Accept help – As above, this is a difficult thing. I want to be Super Mum, I want to be able to do everything and then some more but I can’t. So, if by some miracle, somebody does see what you need and offers to help, graciously accept their offer. They are not offering pity, they are offering you a hand, they are offering you love and want to do what they can to make life that little bit easier.

* Be accountable -What form this would take for you, I don’t know. For me it meant sharing my condition and struggles here, on the blog and finally sharing with the world that I was suffering and not coping. By doing so I have been surrounded by the most amazing support group and discovered others have been here before. I’m not alone and neither are you.

* Take the time to look after yourself - We all know how hard it is to get time to ourselves with husbands, children, pets, extended family and housework to take our attention, but we need to make sure we are looking after the person who looks after everyone else. Ourselves. If we’re not happy then it spreads to all those we love and care for. If you’ve been following my It’s ALL About Me posts, then you know that this is something I am trying to work into my family life.

* Ban the negative thoughts – In the above paragraph the urge to tell you I was failing was very strong but FAIL is a word I have banned myself from thinking and saying. Such a negative word that does nothing but bring you down. Trying to replace negative thought patterns with positive affirmations can be a powerful thing.

None of these things are easy. They take time, practice, courage, energy and while it may seem you simply don’t have the ability to do more, it is worth giving them a shot and finding the things that make your life easier, things that help you through the day and make good days trump the bad.

If you’ve been here, too, please feel free to share some of the things that helped you.

Other posts on You + PND:

You + PND: Know the Signs
You + PND: So Now What?You + PND: The Shame Factor {Coming Soon}

It’s ALL About You: A Giveaway

Posted by becky on Feb 24, 2011 in Uncategorized | 11 comments

I am so excited to be bringing you the first giveaway in conjunction with my It’s ALL About Me posts and I have to tell you, I love what’s up for grabs (I wrote posts, I get to enter, right?) from my first IAAM sponsor; Amelia Rose.

From her website:

Sunbound

Vision

Both are 5×7” Photographic prints, matted and ready for framing (8×10” Finished size). YOU want these. I want these and I already have a beautiful print generously given to me to light up my day – and it does.

To be in the running all you need to do is make sure you are a follower of my blog, pop over to the Amelia Rose website then come back here and leave a comment on this post telling me which is your favourite print.

For extra entries; join in with my It’s ALL About Me linky this week (open now) or next. Those who have joined in the past two weeks have also received extra entries.

Entries close March 5th 2011 (AEST, ie Sydney time) and will be drawn by Random.org. Please note, entry is only open to Australian residents and be sure I have your contact details in case you win!!

If the prize is not claimed within a week, this competition will be redrawn. 

You can keep up-to-date with Amelia Rose on Facebook (tell her beckyandjames.com sent you), Made It and Etsy. I, for one, am excited to see what’s to come.